Apparently everything in my apartment has decided to stop working. My wine bottle opener (tear), my lamp and my DVD player. Dave and I were going to have a glass of wine and watch a movie. The bottle opener was like "enjoy your wine with your cork in it!" You think that stopped us? Puh-lease. I have a strainer and a jug. Let's do this!
Next was the DVD player. "You want to watch a movie? Enjoy this freezing and skipping ahead five scenes!" We finished the movie so I consider that battle won. Kiss it DVD player.
The lamp was just having a seizure in the corner while I was trying to take care of the DVD player issues. I bought you at IKEA lamp! You are cheap and replaceable!
The good thing with arguing with inanimate objects is they never yell back.